the anti-feminist movement

I realized today that they don’t give out matches like they used to. There used to be trays of matchbooks in all the fancy-pants restaurants and hotels. They were located by the host or concierge and they populated the bar. But not anymore. And it’s really a shame. Everyone should have matches or something at their house; we mastered fire, dammit. Use it. People used to collect those matchbooks. Tourists and sad, single, middle-aged ladies needed those matchbooks. And so do I. Matchbooks are cool. Matchbooks say, “Hey, I went to this place where people light things on fire.”