if the world owed you a beer cozy, you wouldn’t have to bring your own.

julie warshaw

don't feed me broccoli last night and act surprised today...

I buy bones for Parker from the grocery store and leave then on the kitchen table. I leave them there for so long that they begin to be buried under a pile of mail. I forget they’re there. But Parker doesn’t. The unusual attention he pays to the kitchen table reminds me that, weeks ago, I left a bone there. You gotta sympathize with the guy. He’s left to his own devices for hours at a time and has never noticeably perpetrated a plan to obtain the table-candy. I think it’s good for his character to accept the fact that we can’t always have what we want, when we want it. Sometimes, we have to wait. And then when we do get it, it’s stale and flavorless; having sat on the kitchen table for the past 2 months.

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